so far so good

so yeah, im on idlebrain.com,totaltollywood.com and cinefolks.com.
i couldnt have asked for more right now. the feedback coming has been very encouraging and its only made my desire stronger....the desire to get this film a legitimate release.

everyone around me thinks thats as far-fetched as reaching the moon. i see their point, and i am a very practical guy. but something tells me, this film will be watched. watched by the general public. yeah. i dont know...its like an instinct almost...

the hurdles and problems ahead are so fairly obvious, yet, i can picture this film playing in a hall.
is this what happens to every film-maker on his first film?

while my writing on the blog has decreased over the days, i urge new readers coming to check archives. they will get you a good idea of how all of this came into being...

interesting times.

as i write, a little more than 500 unique views of my trailer has been made. thank god for technology and the internet. there would have been no other way on earth for me to bring my film forward to the public.

also, i have been lucky in that some websites have decided to support me on this, and have kindly accepted to carry links to the trailer.
one such is www.telugucinema.com, who is carrying an article on c.o.f today.

while all this is wonderful, its also overwhelming, because i understand i am answerable some way or the other to people. i am prepared for it.
meanwhile, i think i'll just take some time and savour these moments.

A TECHNICALLY BETTER QUALITY TRAILER

Hi,
I didnt anticipate such a reduction in sound and picture quality on the web. But it cant be helped it seems. So i have tried to upload one more with a marked difference in technical quality.
Let me know..

meanwhile i have been overwhelmed with the response so far and demands for more cuts. i am working on it...meanwhile I realise its time to update my blog...

yohan
p.s follow this link to the better quality trailer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4m4xNSix_sw

WORLD TRAILER PREMIERE OF 'CONFESSIONS'

OK IT'S OUT AND I'M SHAKING..... CHECK OUT MY TRAILER,CURRENTLY PLAYING ON 'YOU TUBE'.
P.S ITS MEANT TO LOOK AND SOUND THE WAY IT IS!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EC-qh9jcwas#

Rajnesh Domalpalli's, 'Vanaja'

Hyderabad based NRI Rajnesh Domalpalli’s debut film Vanaja won Best First Feature Award 2007 (Golden Bear) at Berlin Film Festival this year. This award consists of a Golden Bear prize and a cash prize of 50,000 euros (shared by producer and director). Vanaja film deals with a 14 year old poor girl who wants to become a classical dancer. This film also deals with sex abuse. Rajnesh wrote this script as a part of his thesis submission in Columbia University in the year 2001. -courtesy:idlebrain.com

HOW WONDERFUL AND INCREDIBLE IS THAT.

THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE FIRST, NOT JUST FOR TELUGU CINEMA BUT INDIAN CINEMA AS WELL.

I HADNT EVER HEARD OF THIS GUY UNTIL TODAY....

I CANNOT BELIEVE ITS NOT FRONT PAGE NEWS ANYWHERE...LEAVE ALONE ANY SORT OF BUZZ ABOUT HIM HERE...

ANYWAYS...HERE'S THREE CHEERS AND HATS OFF TO RAJNESH DOMALPALLI. do we have an auteur on our hands??

go to vanajathefilm.com and check him out on

imdb.com>>> http://imdb.com/title/tt0832971/

a truthful confession

this was the most emotional trying day in a long time for me. and not because of anything sad. but because i had to face a lot of self assesment situations and give a lot of long overdue sentiments. shit i hate my phrasing sometimes. i cant seem to help the jibberish.lets move to the next paragraph. (did someone say 'technology at the speed of though'?) ok i'll shut up and move to the next para..

this was the most emotionally trying days for me in a long time.

i talked about my film at length for the first time with my dear friend siraj, and in the process, understood myself and my film better. ironical did you say? well no, my humble adivise, and i'm not sri sri ravi sankar or deepak chopra....but try and talk about your...oh shit my mom just came upstairs to say that she has never in her life seen me behave the way i just did....sigh....fuck i'm digressing (is that even the right spelling?). let me try again...

this was an interesting day for me today. its been 2 whole days of absolutely no editing, for no fault of mine. it just so happens the studio is busy, because some big ass lady politician wants to promote telangana videos sitting her ass in chennai. and what am i, when it comes to priority...nothing. (did i tell you, 'confessions of a politician' is my next film, i'm not even kidding, it'll have a huge budget and shit).

anyways.... so 2 days of no editing. bad. because i feel like i have let my baby daughter stranded in a creche. and i miss her. i want to see her as soon as possible. my heart aches to see those familiar visuals and silly dialougue floating across the screen and into my heart, bringing a flutter of familiar feeling. the most bestest feeling of all...the feeling of feeling familiar and at home with your creation. that bond.so much like family,friends and loves.

anyways, i am digressing again.

i was chatting with siraj over drinks tonight, about wonderful stuff like the world and how we see it and where we want to time travel etc. and we finally settled on gentler turf, like my film confessions of a film-maker.

confessions, i was saying to him....is also a synonym for truth.

now that strangely was a revelation to me because i hadnt thought of it like that until one peg down. the truth people. my film is about the truth. its not packaged like all sensible and illogical films are....packaged with drama,emotion,heroics,flashy camera and edits,soaring music,mushy moments,skimpy women......my film has none of that...and therefore i beg you not to judge it by those barometers.

not only does my film not have all of the above, its all so deeply personal and cathartic, that it will take a lot of patience and balance of mind to truly appreciate what my film is about....now please i dont mean to be mean or insulting by saying that....all i'm saying is....

my film is only about the truth, as i see it and as it is. cut and dry. simple and straight. so plain, so simple, so truthful. i pre-decided when i started out, that what i was making was more than just a film in the conventional sense.....simply put...its something similar to what jerry maguire might have documented in that movie...remember the intial scene in the movie....when in a burst of inspiration he writes something like a vision statement....and then gets fired the next day....well i bet what he wrote might have had a lot to say....but it still got him fired because people didnt like it.

i think my film is like that...its so boringly,simplingly truthful....it WILL NOT APPEAL to anyone. and if it does....well thats a small miracle.

we arent used to being told about things which are truthful, not revlotionary mind you...we dont see cinema, where truth is the genre...its always, like say movies about jfk or gandhi...supposed truth which is packaged....its also a truth which is motivational....

my film is a truth which is, pretty much what you get...imagine this...i think my audience is the priest who sits to listen to a confessional....its as plain and simple as that...how you react or judge it is upto you....

but i ask you this....dont judge the truth...you can either accept it or reject it.....dont judge it...

i have to say this....and i will say it just once on this blog....my film shouldnt be judged, because if i wanted it to be judged then i would have made it differently.....but if you simply want a testimonial of someone about his life in the movies....then you'll see the point....otherwise you will plainly reject it....

my film doesnt want to move mountains, let alone humans...its only wants to act as a testimony to someones feelings...thats it, thats my film...

progressive interpretation

been busy with the final edit the past couple of days. its been a tough but good experience so far. basically what i am doing is shaping the film, for possibly the one last time. so i pretty much have to decide for myself everytime i move onto another scene, that the one before is as good as it can possibly get and thats enough, more importantly, the audience will perfectly understand what i'm saying etc.
so really its tough making those decisions, cus you have to be really brave to expect people to get what it is that your'e saying....oh well enough about that...

anyone keenly looking forward to this film, well i have to first warn you...its pretty abstract this film, my definition of that is that, its a film that will let you make up your mind about it, rather than the other way round...
another thing, its totally unconventional, in that...it doesnt have a traditional form of presentation like any movie...
imagine your'e watching a series of, hopefully interesting interviews that a cameraman has with the film-maker....thats it....technically its no better than blair witch or anything.....

but it has a lot to say.....

final edit

ever since the final dub was done, i've been waiting for the final edit to start. its taken a while for the studio to be available. i finally start today evening.
thats it, its make or break from here, over the next few days i have to do whatever it takes to get this film out with its true potential......

i want to do that and thats it....after that, it will be a few public screenings....which will hopefully motivate me to..

a. go to the press with this
b. apply to festivals
c. try and get a release made, either theatrically or otherwise....

however if the all round reviews are terrible then i am going to kerala.

2nd show

some films must never be judged. you see, films have a more important reason other than mere entertainment, that reason is "to set the record straight".a testament to the times, almost like a news story, its just that, sometimes you simply have to know, you are the better having known it, there cannot be any questions like artistic merit, entertainment value, box office value etc etc.

surprised i'm saying that? i've actually never understood the business angle of films. did shakespeare write his plays keeping the audience in mind. or did the audience just become his mind?

look, i agree that when you put your money into something, especially something which means a lot to you and could to millions around you,be careful, but then dont get too expectant about rolling in cash, if your'e smart, you might just make whatever you invested. thats enough isn't it?

did da vince, michaelangelo,rembrandt,mozart,beethoven create their art keeping the potential money they'd make? well maybe they did later, but not when they started out...

because when they started out all they wanted to do was to experience the joy of creation. i think since men will never have the pleasure of bearing a child, you will find them more obsessed about building blocks,bridges and movies. instinctively a man knows he's not blessed with the fortune of a woman...the fortune that she has of being a creator....

anyways, i think i am digressing or maybe i'm not. anurag kashyaps 'black friday' is not worthy of a review. and by not worthy i mean...it simply shouldnt be reviewed.
how can you review a piece of film-making which is simply about putting the record straight...you cannot and should not judge it...because its not a film that wants to either entertain you nor enligthen you...it simply wants to put the record striaght with you...

and that it does with supreme success. the genre of films that 'black friday' belongs to is fast fading, actually its extinct...his effort will create a revival of sorts. for me personally, i saw bits and pieces of my own film in anurag's. ofcourse it has none of its strengths, technically or otherwise...but it reflects very closely with the soul of my film....
i take a lot of strength, confidence and motivation from that...if your'e reading anurag, thanks...

and, please i'm not being boastful...
i'm simply setting the record straight...

no dhamaka

man, the severs been giving me trouble. the dubbing work of the film is done. there is some additional photography left for me to do, before i begin editing again...

and..cant get myself to write anything much today...too tired

just in case

sorry about the lack of updates, servers been shitty my end...will have a new dhamaka post up in the next hour or so....until then.

another shitty day, until black friday

i had big hopes today. they didnt materialise. now it seems like i have to do this myself (sorry for being vague).
but yeah, tomorrow, from tomorrow i need to work extra hard to get this film made. i dont know what i have made. i think this film is so personal, that it might not work for anyone else, simply cus i didnt make it for anyone else.
and just the thought that someone will criticise even one frame of my film, makes my blood boil.
i'm crazy man. i think the americans have it easy, they either go to a therapist, a counsellor, or maybe a friend or family member.....
we indians find doing any of that too difficult....well i wont generalise, but i think india as a culture promotes self angst because its anti 'us' messing 'other' peoples heads with 'our' problem(dis-jointed sentences=fucked head)
...how many of you have grown up being yelled at for crying!!! lol....alright. well this is the case with me atleast...

fuck i'm digressing, this a confession of a film-maker website and film-makers are not people.
they are heartless,gutless,selfish,horse-blinded,lunatics.

....and the worst of them make the best film-makers.

and anurag is one of them,here's to anurag kashyap and his film 'black friday'. the most courageous film-maker in modern indian cinema history and my definition of a film-maker.
his film finally opens this week....